Normandy and the Ice bucket Challenge
by SparklyQuarians
Summary: The Normandy crew do the ice bucket challenge for war orphans, only one spoilsport refuses to do it. That doesn't sit well with Shepard, all must do the challenge, willingly or not.


**Authors Notes: Got bored so wrote this.**

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><p><span><strong>Ice bucket challenge<strong>

Shepard lent down to the camera in front of her, "Is it ready?" She asked Vega.

"Yep, go for it, Lola," Vega held the camera up, taking in the small space of the men's shower room, Liara and Tali were next to Shepard, a big bucket on the floor.

"Ok, so this my Ice bucket challenge vid on behalf of the War orphans charity, so far the crew have donated 2,000 credits. I was nominated by my Husband, Lieutenant Vega, thanks baby."

"You are very welcome, Lola," Vega said behind the camera.

"Anyway, I would like to nominate Kaidan, Steve, I hope you guys didn't really think you'd gotten away with it, you have 24 hours guys. Ok, Tali, Liara, do it," Liara and Tali tip the bucket of icy cold water over Shepard, "Omg, that is freezing," Shepard grabbed a towel to dry her hair.

"Shall I warm you up, Lola?" Vega asked with a smirk.

"You better, you nominated me for that," Shepard cuddled Vega.

Vega laughed, "Can you tell me you wouldn't have nominated me?"

"That is not the point, James," Shepard scowled at Vega.

"Ha, so you would have, I just got in first."

"Oh, shut up, Lieutenant, Millie has probably woken up now," Shepard flicked her hair, spraying Vega with cold water.

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><p>Shepard pushed Kaidan into the men's shower room, "Kaidan, stop being a baby, I've done it and at least it weren't your own Husband who nominated you, you get to do it with him."<p>

"I don't wanna do it, it'll be cold," Kaidan whined.

"Kaidan, Steve is gonna be all wet and cold, think of the possibilities."

Kaidan suddenly perked up, "Ok, where's Steve?"

Steve entered the room with Garrus and Vega, "I'm right here, let's do this, I'm not having Vega show me up."

"At least you havent made the performance that Garrus did," Shepard threw Garrus a knowing look.

"Hey, I only agreed to that stupid challenge, because you wouldn't give up until I did it," Garrus fluttered his mandibles in indignation.

"People, can we get on with this? Vega asked as he set up the camera, "Ready when you are guys."

Kaidan stood in front of the camera with Steve, "This is our Ice bucket challenge, my Husband and I were nominated by Shepard, who is standing behind me, ready to drench me with icy water. We nominate Joker as he is the only one on the ship that hasnt done it," Kaidan stood next to Steve, both preparing to have an icy shower.

Shepard and Garrus poured the water on their heads, Kaidan gasped, "Oh that is cold, how many ice cubes did you but in Shepard?"

"No more, than what was in mine, if you can't take you are obviously a wimp."

"Just so you know, I'm not doing that stupid challenge," Joker's voice filled the small room.

"Awww, Joker, come on, the rest of us have done it," Shepard pouted.

"No, I'm not doing it, you can't make me do it."

Shepard smirked malevolent, her mind already planning, "We shall see Joker, we shall see."

"Dont you even think about it, Shepard, I can hear the malevolence in your voice."

"I'm thinking about nothing," Shepard tried her best to feign ignorance, "Millie is due a feed, you coming James?"

"Yeah," James followed Shepard out of the Shower room, "We getting him right?" He whispered.

"Oh yeah, lets plan his downfall."

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><p>Joker remained on high alert over the next few days, Shepard was definitely planning something, but she was unpredictable, so she could strike, any time, any place.<p>

Joker walked into the deserted men's shower room, stripping off, he stepped into the stall, he turned on the shower, groaning when no water came out, "Oh no!" Shepard ran into the shower room and threw icy water at him, Joker ducked in time, the water hitting the back of the stall, "Get out of here, Shepard," Shepard ran out of the room, leaving an annoyed Joker behind, who failed to notice Shepard stealing his hat.

Joker felt himself getting annoyed, he'd been searching for hours for his hat, he knew Shepard was up to something else. He stepped off the life to the crew deck, something caught his eye on the door of the Women's shower room. He walked to the door, his hat hanging high on the door. Joker reached up, just about to get the hat, then he realised, it was another trick, he jumped back as water poured down from the door, "Nice try, Shepard," He uttered.

Shepard watched on the ship's cameras, "Grrrr, I'm gonna get you Joker," Shepard turned to Millie, "Its time to break out the big guns, baby girl," Millie squealed happily as Shepard pick her up, carrying her down to the shuttle bay.

Joker sat in the deserted Mess hall, Shepard had gone quiet, he still wouldn't rest, Shepard was never one to give up.

"Joker, go down and search the shuttle bay, Millie has disappeared," Joker noted Shepard sounded desperate.

Joker get down to the Shuttle bay, he could hear the cooing and babbling of Millie coming from one of the shuttles, walked to the shuttle, "Hey Millie, what you doing," He asked as he approached her, not realising Shepard had climbed up the shuttle, just as Joker was reaching Millie, he felt the icy shower hit him from above.

"Booom!" Shepard shouted from the top of the shuttle as Millie squealed with delight, clapping her chubby little hands, "I said I'd get you, Joker."

Joker looked up at Shepard, water pouring down his face from his short hair, " Really Shepard, using your own Daughter to get to me."

"What can I say, Millie inherited my malevolent streak. James, did you get it?"

Vega, Steve and Kaidan appeared from their hiding space behind a stack of boxes, "I did, Lola, its uploaded now."

"Joker, it could have been so simple, if you just let us do it the normal way." Shepard climbed down from the shuttle, back turned away from Joker. Joker smiled as he noticed another full bucket of water, he picked it up, dumping the contents over her head, "Joker, you asshole," Shepard shivered from the cold water, Millie laughing so hard, she fell over, "Oh thanks, you little traitor."

"Sorry, Shepard, but I couldnt resist," Joker smirked as he strolled away smugly, triumphant, yes he got soaked, but at least he took the victory from Shepard's hands, for that he felt victorious.


End file.
